Thursday, April 16, 2015

Two dreams

First dream...

I was on a trip in Illinois with my parents and sister.  It's 2008.  They were horrible to me.  They grabbed my arm and started dragging me around the tent we were in.  I screamed and aid I'd press charges.  I finally got away and headed up the hill of our campground.  There were people scattered about the campground.  I called 911 and I was so scared!

Before that, they told me we might stay overnight, somewhere, and I packs one T-shirt (my green Briggs and Stratton shirt) and one pair of underwear (the ugly ones with the light blue diamonds) and then they said we'd be one for more than one night.  I had no way to get home, I was trapped.  I was so scared.  My mom leaned in next to me to tell me I smelled disgusting and like body odor.  I can't remember the exact words, but they were very hurtful.

Second dream...

I went to Aunt Gloria's house to use an engineering textbook she said she had that I could buy from her.  I went into the basement (a nice basement, not really her house or basement), and I looked through the text.  I went upstairs when I was done and asked her if $20 was enough for it.  She said "Yes, for right now."  I gave her the $20.  I asked her how much more she expected me to pay and she said "Forty dollars...two payments of $40."  I was shocked and told her I might as well buy a new book.  She got angry and said it was a new book.  I was frustrated and tried to explain to her that it was different buying a new book from a bookstore, compared to a "like new" book, but suddenly I was at a loss for words.


First dream...

To dream of being attacked represents people or situations that you feel are hurting you emotionally or that threaten your sense of security. It may also reflect fears that you are giving in to. Other people may be angry or defensive with you. Issues that threaten a loss of some kind or increase unwanted risk (like illness, a financial loss, or something that threatens your relationship.).   Some issue in your life is overwhelming you and you feel powerless to stop it.   Attacks in a dream may also represent your feelings about the current relationships.

To dream that you are having a conversation with your mother indicates unresolved problems that need to be worked out with her.

If you dream that your father is the one beating you, then it implies a lack of emotional connection with your father.  If you dream that your father is angry at you, it may be a projection of your own anger towards him.  If your father is angry or sad in a dream it may reflect anger with your father due to past issues with your father.

To dream of your sister represents the bond that you both share. Either you are very close or you are often in conflict with each other.

To dream that you are camping implies that you are facing much stress and pressure in your life. You want to get away and have some time to unwind and rest. Perhaps you have a desire to live a less complicated life or spend some time in a more calm and serene environment.

To dream of changing clothing represents a change of attitude, behavior, interest, or focus, changing how you act or feel, or approaching a situation differently or choosing to change.

Body Odor:
To smell body odor in your dream signifies an issue or problem that needs to be addressed.

To dream that you are embarrassed means you may have just realized a weakness or feel unprepared. A lack of self-confidence.

It may also represent psychological or emotional issues that you are overcoming.

You may be wanting to escape from the pressures of life.  Depending on the context of your dream, the color blue can also reflect a mood of anguish and despair.

The appearance of this number in your dream suggests that you need to not be afraid to ask for help. There is an important lesson to be learned from in your dream.  The number 911 in a dream represents feelings of emergency, life crisis, or an unpleasant challenge.  Something you may be desperate to escape.  If you call 911 in a dream it reflects something in your life that you really want to go away. You can't stand something. A person or a problem that really bothers you or threatens you.

To dream that you are climbing a steep hill reflects dangers and struggles, as well as feelings about an obstacle in your life being particularly difficult achieving a goal. Your dream should be a motivation to push yourself and reach for your goals.  This is a challenge which requires you to try your hardest or be stubborn to overcome it, and you need to push yourself hard to achieve your goals.

To dream that you went on a trip denotes that something in your waking life is not in order. Things may be a bit problematic these days for you.

To dream that you are trapped suggests that you are feeling confined and restricted in a personal relationship.  There may be a problem in waking life that you feel there is no escaping.
Second dream:

To dream of textbooks represents all known knowledge or experience about a subject or issue. Everything you already know about an issue or problem that can be applied to a current life situation.  To see textbooks in your dream indicate that you still have a lot of learning to do and knowledge to gain.

To dream of a basement represents your deepest darkest thoughts, emotions, and memories. A basement points to problems that you don't want to deal with or issues that may be very uncomfortable thinking about. A situation or memory that is so negative that you can't forget it or think about anything else.   Alternatively, a basement may reflect the worsening of a problem or trouble that you are overwhelmed by.   A basement is a sign that you may have unresolved issues.

To dream of a school book store may represent your interest or drive to know absolutely everything in a particular area. A sign that you wish to be fully prepared or always have all the answers to potential problems.

The number twenty indicates that you are in need of support. Perhaps you are feeling withdrawn and isolated.  You may be struggling to get your power back. You may also be confused with which direction to take to achieve power.

Negatively, the number 40 may reflect closure that is occurring that other people may not like. Hard feelings left over now that you are securely independent.  Forty denotes that time is on your side. It is a period of cleansing, preparation and growth.

 It can also symbolize double weakness or double strength. The world is seen as being made up of dualities (i.e. parents vs child) and opposites, as in the male and female, mother and father, light and dark, heaven and hell, yin and yang, etc....The number 2 in a dream represents conflict, or two opposing sides struggling against each other. When you see it in a dream it represents a conflict in your life, or in the way you think or feel. It may represent different ideas, beliefs or choices struggling with each other, or arguments or trouble accomplishing goals.

To give or spend money in your dream is analogous to giving love. You are looking for love.  Positively, money reflects possibility, power, and opportunity, valuable advice, and feeling capable.  To dream of money represents the power to attain goals or objectives. The objectives can be psychological, emotional, or achieving desired experiences in waking life. You are able to think, feel, or do what you want in life.

To dream of a dead aunt may reflect feelings about alternative outcomes in your life reversing.

Friday, June 21, 2013

My sister married the prince, his guards beat me

My sister married a Prince of a Middle Eastern country in an old 1950s era train driving through Europe.  I wasn't allowed to be in the wedding car, or to even meet the Prince.  I didn't know if this man was a good man or a bad man, only that he was a very powerful man.  I asked the guards if I could talk to my sister.  They spit in my face.  I screamed at them and demanded to talk to my sister.  Two guards took me to a small car.  The inside of it was blue, and the pain was chipping.  Then, four of them took turns kicking out my teeth, kicking me in my kidneys, breaking my nose into the floor, and ultimately breaking one of my legs.  They left the room in high spirits.  I was so beaten I half-crawled, half-scooted out of the room.  I made it all the way up to the men who had hurt me before and I spit a mouth of blood and saliva on their boots.  They grabbed me by my long hair and slammed my head into a window so hard it cracked, even though it was really heavy duty.  Then they drug me back into the car with the blue chipped pain on it and beat me more.

The dream went on this way all night, with me waking up screaming, and shoving pillows, hubby, and stuffed animals away from me while I fought in my sleep.  It was no surprise when I finally got up to stay up this morning and was in incredible pain.

This is yet another dream that has something to do with the Middle East.  This is because I read about the Middle East a lot on the news, and was looking at different hijabs online last night before I fell asleep.  I also read a lot about the Middle East before I fall asleep on a pretty normal basis.  I'm really into Middle Eastern stuff and it commonly makes it's way into my dreams. ;-)

The color dark blue represents insensitivity. Thoughts, comments, or situations that are cold and uncaring. Something positive that lacks concern for other people's feelings. This color is often associated with situations where you or someone else is being cold, blunt, or harsh.  The color dark blue may also reflect brutal honesty that doesn't feel good or a very difficult situation that is in your best interest.

To dream that you are beaten, indicates that you need to make some fundamental changes to your character. You need to make some conscious adjustments and evaluations. Alternatively, it suggests that someone is pushing you beyond your limits.

Wednesday, January 23, 2013

Old Dreams: Dream of August 1st, 2008

I was walking in a park in the bright sunshine.  I felt a breeze on my face.  I remember the grass being very green and lush.  I was in the park to watch an outdoor movie but something was holding it up.  While I was standing there waiting for the movie to begin a man walked up to me and asked me if I wanted to go on an indoor picnic.  I was not attracted to the man but thought that perhaps we could be friends.  He led me into a town and we walked down a hot sidewalk up to a building.  I wondered who would have a picnic in such an ugly building.  Then he got out a huge set of keys, unlocked the door, and pushed me inside at the same time I realized that it was a prison.  I asked for him to let me out and he said no, but instead led me down the hall to a big room.  Once in the room he locked the door behind me.  It was dimly lit with a gray painted cement floor.  The room was covered in filth.  There were bleacher seats four levels high in different spots around the rectangular room.  He led me to a table at one end of the room.  Once there a uniformed man poured stale black coffee into a Styrofoam cup.  He then picked up a piece of stale white bread, slathered it in disgusting mayonnaise, and stuffed it into the cup.  This was the picnic the men were offering me.  They told me to go sit down on a bleacher.  I sat at the end of the first set on the left, two levels up.  I looked around the room and noticed that there were only women held prisoner there.  All of the guards were men and they talked among themselves.  These women in this prison never said a word.  The women had a dead look in their eyes and their skin was gray.  I noticed one woman I know sitting about four feet from me.  She did not recognize me but looked straight ahead.  I would have thought that she was dead if she wasn’t still sitting up holding her own Styrofoam cup of burnt coffee, stale white bread, and mayonnaise.  I realized that I may be locked in there indefinitely so I held my breath and tried to swallow what was in my cup.  When it touched my lips it changed into just warm water instead of the disgusting filth it was before.  I was not yet one of them and realized that I never would be.   I walked up again to the desk and told them I wanted out of here.  They laughed and said they’d let me out when they were ready, maybe 20 or 30 minutes.  These women had all gone to this place by choice and had no desire to leave.  They would live in there forever, rot in there forever.  I wasn’t going to.   That never was what I wanted.  I waited a few more minutes planning my next move.  Then the man who had led me there in the first place unlocked the door and I walked through both it and the door to the outside.  Once outside in the sunshine I could see through the window of a coffeehouse.  Inside the window were two beautiful girls having lunch together.  One was blond and the sun was shining on her hair through the window.  It was done in a 1940’s style and was gorgeous.  She had rolled it, pinned it, and put on bright red lipstick.  She looked over at me.  I tried to walk toward them but instead the man who had finally let me out pinned me against the brick wall I was standing near.  He laughed.  It was a power struggle, nothing more.  I looked up and an overweight bald man with a red face was leering at me, he had huge handcuffs dangling from his belt.  I stopped struggling against the man and once he thought he won I slipped out.  The big man with handcuffs handed me a paper bag with a lunch in it.  I never looked in it, I never wanted it.  I walked down the sidewalk toward the coffeehouse and he never even realized that he wasn’t the winner.

Friday, May 13, 2011

Middle East again

I was taken to the Middle East and my children were taken from me.  I was in a large tent with many Arabic men.  They proceeded to rape me one by one, then, in a game they decided what tortures to do to me.  First they decided to throw acid on me, and then to brand me hot pokers from the fire.  The pain, the humiliation, the raw fear, and defeat all hit me, not just the me in my dream.  I woke up crying.  I'm not sure if I started calling out before or after I awoke.

Neck pain nightmare I

I had a dream last night I was at my rheumatologist's office crying.  I was in intense pain and begging my doctor to help me.  I asked her to do anything to stop the pain.  I told her she could knock me out, crank my neck, cut me open, I didn't care, just make the pain stop.  She said she couldn't do anything.  I begged her to send me to a doctor who could.  I asked her if I needed to see a doctor about possible Chiari or if I have a neck problem [that my physical therapist couldn't feel].  I told her to send me anywhere, do anything, please make the pain stop.  She just kept repeating over and over that she couldn't do anything.

Sunday, March 27, 2011


Last night I dreamt I was being skinned alive.  They started at my stomach, where they could grab some loser skin, and they pulled tight, skinning me as I screamed.

This is a theme that often shows up in my dreams.  I think last night the dream was made worse because I am out of one medication (Lamictal).

Wednesday, February 23, 2011

Painful nightmare

His foot was on my back between my should blades, and he pressed down hard.  I was in a tent with a militant Islamic man training a gun at my head.  I could taste the dust on the ground.  I could hear foreign tongues that I could not understand.  We were in the Middle East and I had been captured by militant terrorists.  Then the man said, and I understood, "You will have every type of physical pain possible [in your life.]"  I woke up in excruciating pain.